The Cold Silent Self

Describing the moon as cold and silent, resonates. Evaluating lack of spirit in those same terms, requires explanation. Kundalini Yoga has given the name, ‘Cold Depression’ to being cut off from spirit. It is a modern malaise where patience, energy, pleasure, and understanding are submerged.  It also expresses in masculine terms through over doing, pushing, anger, and frustration.

This is a seeming epidemic where feelings, even identity, have sunk below the surface, barely operating at full capacity.  This “Silence of the Self” is the cold side of the moon where the light of the ego and identity cannot create the energy to shine or throw off heat. It is when we are forlorn, lost to ourselves, lost to our creative imagination. We often try to heat, and compensate for its emptiness with too many coffees, sugar-bombs, alcohol, over-eating, over-doing, over-spending, over-tweeting.

 Loss of energy is nervous-making.  When we feel we don’t have enough juice for flight if frightened, we are even more scared and defensive.  We may unconsciously create chaos and crises to force adrenaline rushes, anything to distract from the no-man’s land of cold depression.

 Finding a way back to that warm, vital, peaceful, balanced Self requires tracking.  Core energy moves from soul to mind, to body.  It is the spirit that decides how much ampage to use and when to use it.  The spirit pulses energy to the brain, then thoughts persuade feelings, and modify action.  When we re-generate a single blocked conduit, re-ignite one positive habit, our engine throttles up.

The amazing force of Yoga is that it works on many-many levels, often at once.  It is manna for the inner landscape, freeing bodies from the inside out.  When/if you don’t have enough fire to stand the mat and do poses, then sit, breathe, chant, create hasta mudra/ hand prayers of intention.  Chanting untangles emotions, sets intention, and clears a path through unconscious gunk.  Pranayama/breath work does the same though it can require more energy.  The tiniest bit of effort toward renewal releases endorphins, shifting the nervous and glandular systems.  If you add meditation, you have a triple whammy.  All these Practices break the emotional hold of cold depression, carrying spirit toward the true Solar-Self, that light-filled being radiating joy and compassion.

When depressed, moving further than the couch is a big deal, or coming down off the high road of rage is difficult.  I know. But I start small, giving myself a tiny, very precise request, such as a single chant, If I can find a co-conspirator, a friend who has my back, to come and chant with me, soon we are laughing at ourselves, and then I know I will be OK.  I know I must do this for myself first, but I also must do it for others.  When we are juicy, with conduits running, we have greatness to offer, a world in need of warm currents.   Begin with the sound-current of joy: “Wahe Guru.”  Say it over and over inside until it bursts forth and carries you toward the next step.     (I am indebted to Shanti Shanti K. Khalsa, Ph.D for much of the information on Cold Depression.) 

Leaning on one another: photo by Will Ceurvels


Pose With Seasonal Notes

Asana: In this teriffically interesting time of massive shifts and changes, of connecting to ‘friends’ on facebook and twitter and linked in that we hardly know, I recommend discovering some true friends. Lean on them, work with them, laugh so that you create strong connections to see you through earthquakes, the mind-fields of seduction, and the speed of change.

 Health Notes: Without friends, we wither.  Cold depression is the perfect description of someone trying to survive without friendships.

 Astrology Notes: Hang on!  The planetary energies setting off the Japanese earthquake, the fall of Mubarak, the quake in New Zealand, the rioting in middle east, the Dalai Lama resigning from political life, and smaller changes ad nauseum, is a force field we will all be dealing with for several years.  The good news is we always have choice, not only in how to respond, but how to use the massive explosion of energy. We can choose to be stressed, or to seek new forms of peace.  We can re-create another depression, even a world war, or we can rise to the next level of Democracy by taking more initiative, more responsibility.  We can heal our wounds, or we can remain trapped against ourselves.

 Ayurvedic Notes:  You have enough to read this week.  Go chant.  Enjoy spring!


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