Inspiration

William Blake said in “Eternity.” “He who binds to himself a joy Does the winged life destroy: But he who kisses the joy as it flies Lives in eternity’s sun rise.” As spring’s haunting hour of splendor turns toward summer, ‘kissing the joy as it flies’ is a full time job. The only dance left is to hold on while letting go,  The difficulty is not simply offering sweet kisses in honor of the season’s bloom, but the speed required to blow those kisses.  How to pucker up and savor while breaking the sound barrier… This is our un-holy alliance.  It is easier to not bind, or cling to splendid moments when we are savvy enough to be present. Or is it? As we grow awareness of the grains of numinous sand running through the hourglass, do we respect and treasure each grain? Do we then create a life that is entirely vivid, more potent? Do we not want to hang on, knowing what we now know, aware of each fleeting gift?  Or is it possible to free-fall, skydiving high cliffs, un-tethered to any yearning?  Rumi wrote:  “The soul’s extravagance is endless.  Spring after spring after spring…We are your gardens dying, blossoming.”  When we remember that in this lavish sea of perfection, and longing, bliss and death, redemption and horror, we then honor our wings and our kisses, our sunrise and sunset. Pose with Seasonal Energies Asana: Dwi Pada Viparita Dandasana.  This looks like a graceful bridge or arc, as though the feet lowered out and away to the floor from Salamba Sirsasana/headstand.  Begin flat on back, placing palms under shoulders, fingers pointing to feet. Bring feet near hips, knees parallel.  Exhale, straighten legs, and bear weight on the hands, neck and head.  Place L hand behind head, forearms on……

The fascinating work in a dance is the moment connecting two moves.  As a long time choreographer I’ve watched a lot of dance.  The ahaaa moment is not necessarily when the leg extends high into the air, though that is glamorous and exciting, rather is is the connective fiber taking the leg toward its next move that is the emotional ahaaa, the emotional glue of the dance.  The go-between moments are the truly creative work in any process.  This prepositional-concept is true in all areas, such as having a fascinating idea.  In dance, the high-held-leg is a magnificent moment. But where does it carry you from there?  What will it become?  How is it powerful, or not?  This is true of Yoga, especially Vinyasa Flow. It is true of Pranayama, in that it is the moment between inhale and exhale that holds the key to an expanded life.  The intention and ability to create strong binding, the fine weaving that holds something together, be it Asanas, Pranayam, dance, poetry, engineering, research…  this is the heart of a creation.   Here, in the space-between, is where bodies and minds, sinew, and soul expose themselves.  This in between moment, like a good preposition, is the gatekeeper toward deeply expressive wisdom. In the Spanda System, the fourth system of the Trika philosophy of Kashmir Shaivism, Hatha Yoga is given focus and direction for seeking experience of the Self, not only to undertake a physical Practice, but a practice of self discovery.  ”As the heart and power of inspiration behind the practice….We look for the ‘in-between’ places, between breaths, and between actions, in which there is the experience of quiet awareness and inspiration.  This awareness of Spanda is the essence of the qualities of the heart expressed in our Practice.”* “Heart of the Yogi.”  By Doug Keller.        When learning something for the first time,……

Remember the training wheels on your first bike?  Or perhaps you were one of those without? You had the scabby knees to prove yourself a flyer. Starting out in anything, especially life, it’s a gift to have the support of training wheels, all kinds of wheels; those, who are the ‘wind beneath your wings.’ These wheels give a leg up to learn faster, push doors open, and therefore rise higher.  I suspect these fabulous lives are well earned by greatness in another life. Most children are given poor or no training wheels.  More still have no bike, never mind a childhood.  But here, I’m questioning differences in those who rolled along with training wheels, and those who got on and fell off a lot, There are different gifts that come from the school of hard knocks.  For one, you tend to be hard headed. Perhaps you don’t consider that a good thing? 2. You are used to flying without a net. Nice if you like heights. 3. You are either more timid, or braver than average. Cultivating balance is difficult. 4. Doors are rarely opened so you stand outside hoping they notice, or you bang the door down.  Early Grace is not a strong suit. The interesting questions are:  What do we do with what we were given?  What do we expect from what we have? How have training wheels, or lack thereof, turned red lights– green, or not?  Have you become who you set out to be?  Hard to know this.  But if your starting gate were today, what sort of training wheels are in place for the coming leap? When you prepare to fly into tomorrow’s unknown, I hope it’s more than hot air that lifts your wings, and pushes your magic bike forward.  I wish for you……

If I am to arc upward Spiraling toward the eternal, As archangels do, Wings curved to carry wind and stars alike. Is every effort out and up? What if the arc flows inward, archpiece of surrender, Answering uncertainty, and the unknown? How then do I take form? How shall I become if Deformed by dark nights, Proudly cobbled of minutiae And mindless desire, Yet, withstanding chaos And elegant wretchedness. I rise above the river- A Self finally seen By those who choose To walk across my stones.  Stone by stone is  That by which Daily deed carves a face,  Forged in Grace, Weight, muscle, and will Linking soul to Seer, Building over chasms, Across forever.

The baby steps are the steps of the mystic.  The large, grandiose steps are the ‘I’ of the ego.  These I/me steps move into the world to learn of   success, or not.  The ego I/me is interested in the objective life as self- mirror to its image.  As big as we make ego-steps, as wonderful as we think they might be, they are limiting, for they are the steps of the smaller self, not the bad self, but the more diminutive-self, for they seek self-affirmation at every bend of the knee. To come to know the true Self requires many small steps for the journey is light years, beyond the I/m.  We need this ego of self, the ahamkara, to relate to the world,  Before we can move beyond anything we must be it.  We rely on the ego’s structure to support movement in the world, to offer knowledge of the many layers and relationships.     The mystic, or spirit self has no boundaries, no structure and this is terrifying to the ego.  If we take small steps when entering this territory, the ego is less threatened by inroads of spirit.  For the ego to be well it must do.  For the mystic to do well it must be.  Being requires attentive loving. When the ego loves, it goes outside self seeking love and affirmation.  The mystic goes within.  This is very much the Yogic journey, for Yoga’s layering offer many means of liberating who we are meant to be, who we already are, and revealing who we are not.  Step by small transformational step a Practice can gracefully hold ego and spirit, not denying, or denigrating one for the other, rather holding both to the light so that we begin asking, “Who am I? How do I express a……

Describing the moon as cold and silent, resonates. Evaluating lack of spirit in those same terms, requires explanation. Kundalini Yoga has given the name, ‘Cold Depression’ to being cut off from spirit. It is a modern malaise where patience, energy, pleasure, and understanding are submerged.  It also expresses in masculine terms through over doing, pushing, anger, and frustration. This is a seeming epidemic where feelings, even identity, have sunk below the surface, barely operating at full capacity.  This “Silence of the Self” is the cold side of the moon where the light of the ego and identity cannot create the energy to shine or throw off heat. It is when we are forlorn, lost to ourselves, lost to our creative imagination. We often try to heat, and compensate for its emptiness with too many coffees, sugar-bombs, alcohol, over-eating, over-doing, over-spending, over-tweeting.  Loss of energy is nervous-making.  When we feel we don’t have enough juice for flight if frightened, we are even more scared and defensive.  We may unconsciously create chaos and crises to force adrenaline rushes, anything to distract from the no-man’s land of cold depression.  Finding a way back to that warm, vital, peaceful, balanced Self requires tracking.  Core energy moves from soul to mind, to body.  It is the spirit that decides how much ampage to use and when to use it.  The spirit pulses energy to the brain, then thoughts persuade feelings, and modify action.  When we re-generate a single blocked conduit, re-ignite one positive habit, our engine throttles up. The amazing force of Yoga is that it works on many-many levels, often at once.  It is manna for the inner landscape, freeing bodies from the inside out.  When/if you don’t have enough fire to stand the mat and do poses, then sit, breathe, chant, create hasta……